Dear Passport, you have been very very good to me. Today, I sent you to the National Passport Center, 9 years and 8 months after we met. Even though you were stuffed with 2 sets of extra pages, you did not complain, you merely asked for more abuse. I am sorry I couldn't fill up too many stamps in that second set of pages, but you knew your life was coming to an end. So, away you went, with an application and a fee, only to have a hole punched in you. You will live on, however, because that Argentina receipt near your rear end will keep me from paying that usurious fee again for many years to come. So, I eagerly await your return, along with that of your offspring. Despite how young (s)he will be, the picture of me is unfortunately, ten years older. In the meantime, I cannot leave the country. A very strange sensation.