Do YOU belong in First Class?

Discussion in 'General Discussion | Travel' started by Steven Schwartz, Jun 2, 2011.  |  Print Topic

  1. Steven Schwartz
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    Steven Schwartz Gold Member

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    Got a copy of Business Traveler on board a BA flight a few days ago and they had a tongue-in-cheek letter about "proles" in First Class. Hysterical - as were the responses. Here it is. What a guy!

    BlackTower - 01/04/2011 20:51 GMT

    I feel moved to raise the specter of ordinary people populating First Class cabins. You know who you are! Please stop reducing the experience for those of us who are wealthy and get back to business class where you belong! Take your rumpled off the peg suits and untidy lives and get out of our way! Your delight at being upgraded and tendency to drink too much distracts from cabin crew attending to the genuine needs of the international super rich and our many homes, cars, mistresses and businesses. The rules are suntan,smart watch, disinterest and cashmere. Do not eat or use the amenity kit and do not talk to fellow passengers unless you met them in Klosters/St Barts. If you can't follow those simple rules then you will never fit in even if you get monied up. Begone with you! As for cabin crew seated in First you are welcome to an upgrade if you die in flight and have suitable cashmere. As a courtesy I am willing to extend that offer to passengers in other classes.
     
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  2. viguera
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    viguera Gold Member

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    LOL
     
  3. Million Mile Secrets

    Million Mile Secrets Silver Member

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    Should we tell the author that we'd have to go back to C-O-A-C-H class if we didn't know how to use our miles and points wisely? :)

    Wonder how much more acerbic he'd be then...!

    Would he have muttered under his breath about the riff raff and asked the Flight Attendant to kindly fumigate the cabin?
     
  4. rwoman
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    rwoman Gold Member

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    Shoot...I have a plastic running watch and am allergic to cashmere...back to the kettles I go...;)
     
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  5. JohnDeere19
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    JohnDeere19 Gold Member

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    Amazing! Now I know why I was self conscious about not wearing a watch on my most recent TATL F trip.
     
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  6. Steven Schwartz
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    Steven Schwartz Gold Member

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    Love YOUR picture above your name. We were lucky enough to fly Swiss First Class last summer and it was a bit better than BA but really, why quibble!
     
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  7. JohnDeere19
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    JohnDeere19 Gold Member

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    Thats exactly what I just flew! Amazing experience!
     
  8. viguera
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    viguera Gold Member

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    Plastic watch flies cargo.

    :)
     
  9. rwoman
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    rwoman Gold Member

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    That's fine...as long as I get where I'm going in time for whatever event I'm partaking in. :D
     
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  10. jmrich1432
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    Too funny! Thanks for a laugh!
     
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  11. rwoman
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    rwoman Gold Member

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    Laughter is infinitely important!! :)
     
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  12. BurBunny
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    BurBunny Silver Member

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    That's a picture of the Swiss First? And you like it even better than the BA experience? Yippee skippee! I have that booked for ZRH-NBO this fall. I'm one happy bunny right now!

    Watch? Check. Cashmere? Quite possibly. Suntan? NEVER! Disinterest? I can fake that with the best of them. Think they'll know I'm a poseur?
     
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  13. diver90
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    diver90 Gold Member

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    That whole statement about "Do not eat or use the amenity kit". Hmmm. Why can't we eat the amenity kit?
     
  14. Scottrick
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    Scottrick Gold Member

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    Back in the day, my parents would always upgrade themselves into F and then bring a bottle of their own wine, since they are total wine snobs, and eventually get lectured by the FA for serving themselves. Of course, you can't get it past TSA now what with the liquids rule, but I remember shaking my head as they planned their scheme prior to each flight. :rolleyes:
     
  15. Steven Schwartz
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    Steven Schwartz Gold Member

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    I think in my case, drinking each of the wines and two Johnny Walker Blue Labels was the fatal giveaway!
     
  16. JohnDeere19
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    Thats a picture of Swiss's new first class (only on A333 right now)...I was surprised to find out that they fly the A333 that route.
     
  17. Million Mile Secrets

    Million Mile Secrets Silver Member

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    Could it also be the continuous taking of pictures?

    I know that's what gives me away!
     
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  18. Scottrick
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    Scottrick Gold Member

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    Oh how I envy you! I have to watch myself now after once making my way through four Dewars flying ORD-MSP (+ 1 hour waiting on the ground, so I was at least still standing when I got off the plane). But don't judge! I only ever asked for one; the FA kept stopping by to give me more to apologize for the delay. :cool:
     
  19. BurBunny
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    Hooray! I'm quite happy that the ZRH-NBO run is being operated on an A333, or at least will be by the time I fly it.
     
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  20. Jubileesmom
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    I'm considered "elite lice" here. I guess I don't belong anywhere? lol
     
  21. Gargoyle
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    Gargoyle Milepoint Guide

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    The real upper class don't wear watches. They have people to attend to trivial details like time and schedule. They also don't fly planes filled with other people- they fly their private jets.

    :D
     
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  22. Flyer
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    See my signature. ;)
     
  23. Infinite1K
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    This reminds me of the very funny bit from the BBC comedy series Come Fly With Me where Penny - a First Class flight attendant - has to work the Economy cabin (for the first time in 20 years).

    Part 1


    Part 2
     
  24. eponymous_coward
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    eponymous_coward Gold Member

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    I don't wear watches since they have routinely stopped working when I wear them since I was a child. The more expensive the watch, the faster it just stopped. So I gave up. That's what cell phones are for, anyway- the modern pocket watch.

    And, well, it was pretty obvious on my first SQ flight I was the n00b. I was more restrained by flight two, though. ;)

    Oh, and updating the trip report in flight or in the lounge? Dead giveaway. :D
     
  25. Canadi>n
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    Canadi>n Gold Member

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    I read the letter in the magazine last week too and fully agree with the writer, most people in international F just don't belong there and are really cluttering the cabin up with their riff raff attitudes. Of course, look around a domestic F cabin these days and the situation is even worse! I dread my two F flights today. Heaven only knows what sort of person will be seated next to me...
     

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