The Monkey's Paw is a horror short story. In the story, the paw of a dead monkey is a talisman that grants its possessor three wishes, but the wishes come with an enormous price for interfering with fate, by the wish being fulfilled in the worst possible way. For example in the story, the holder wishes for £200 on the Monkey's Paw. Their son is killed by machinery at his company, and they receive compensation of £200 granting the wish. I invite you to attempt to grant the wish posted above yours, staying 100% faithful to the literal request, but in the worst possible way against the spirit/intention of the poster or with otherwise worst possible outcomes. Being creative and a little bit devious helps Then post your own wish, being as airtight as possible. Rules: Exactly one wish and one granting per post. Wishes and grants must be approximately 140 characters of English. (Anyone can write an airtight wish in an unlimited amount of space.) No wishing for anything of better than a wish (e.g. more wishes, ability to grant wishes, etc). You are ominpotent to fulfill (and pervert) the preceding wish. Grant MUST actually fulfill the wish as stated. Example: WISH: I wish I had a million dollars. GRANTED: Through a series of unfortunate events, you have been mistaken for a bank robber and given 1 million dollars and have been arrested for grand larceny. Have fun! WISH: Wired and wireless hi-speed internet is now really fast & free to all.